What is black, white, red, and has trouble going through revolving doors?
A nun with a spear in her head.

The pope goes to visit the Seven Dwarfs who are drinking in a bar. As he is finishing his speech on comparative religions, Dopey raises his hand to ask a question.
"Mr. Pope, are there any dwarf nuns in Rome?".
"No Dopey," responds the Pontiff, "there are not".
"Mr. Pope, are there any dwarf nuns anywhere in Italy?", Dopey questions.
"No Dopey," chuckles the Pope, "there are no dwarf nuns in Italy."
"Mr. Pope," Dopey asks pleadingly, "are there any dwarf nuns anywhere in the world?"
"No Dopey," the Pope says sadly, "there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world."
And softly in the background the six remaining dwarves start chanting,
"Dopey screwed a penguin, Dopey screwed a penguin."

What is the definition of 'suspicion'?
A nun doing push-up's in a cucumber patch.

Three nuns were walking down the road when a flasher jumps out at them. Two of the nuns had a stroke, but the third couldn't reach.

Two nuns were driving down a cobbled street.
One of them said "I've never come this way before."
The other replied "It's the cobbles that make it good."

Two more nuns were driving down the road when a wampyre (That's the correct way to spell vampire, BTW - DJ Ess) jumped onto their bonnet at a red light.
"Mother Superior, Mother Superior, what should we do?" said you young nun in the passenger seat.
"Get out of the car and show him your cross, sister."
So the sister gets out of the car, walks fearlessly up to the wampyre and shouts "Get off the fucking car!"

This is page J3